Friday, April 27, 2012

Movie Theatres

I went to see an okay movie recently.  But do you know what I hate? I hate it when people talk during movies.  I really want to say something obscene but I remember my manners and classily say:


But alas, I feel like that would be hypocritical.

What's even more annoying + awkward is when you see two people doing THIS right next to you:
Ahem. Sucking face.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Sharing is caring


Double dipping is a horrible thing that should never EVER happen . . . EVER.  Whenever I see a big dipping bowl/buffet tray, I get suspicious about what happened prior to my arrival. 



Eating from a double-dipped bowl/tray is like sucking face with someone in the room.  Ew.


Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Dreaming

Does this make sense?

Turkeys can fly

I live in an area where there are a LOT of turkeys.  And when I say a lot, I do mean a lot.  Every year the turkey population seems to be getting bigger and bigger too.


What I found out recently is that these wild turkeys can fly . . . at least a little.  What's even stranger is the fact that these wild turkeys form a colony and all live together in one tree -- it's like a Christmas tree, but with turkeys.  It's a Thanksgiving tree.


It's not a bad idea actually.  Why don't we have festive trees on Thanksgiving?  Why does Christmas have to be the only time that we get to decorate a tree?

Monday, April 16, 2012

Spontaneously combustible pistachios

Do you know how you sometimes look for something on the Internet, but end up finding something totally different?  Well today I ended up researching spontaneous combustion and found out that pistachios (because of their "high fat content and low water content") can spontaneously combust.


I don't know why, but now I have strange visualizations of spontaneously combustible pistachios because of this newfound information.



Ah geez.


Typo 2


Get it?

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Think positively

Lately I've been feeling a bit down, so I've been telling myself to stay positive.  But usually this is what happens:



It's gotten pretty bad over the past few days.  And I probably should stop being so negative all the time because I think it's rubbing off onto my family and friends.




Eheh. Yeah.  BUT I'M WORKING ON IT, OKAY?  

Grammar Nazis

I is sad cuz of grammar nazis.  Me is sorry that I no use proper grammar, but sometime I forgot to has proper grammar.  I understands when people uses grammar improperly too oftens so people wants to helps out, but with grammar nazis, one missteps and . . .


But seriously now.  I know that sometimes I might have bad grammar (especially when I'm crazy/excited, which is pretty much all the time), but I don't need someone autocorrecting me all the time.  I have an iPhone for that.


I wish we could all get along together in an imperfect world <3.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Why people shouldn't fly

If there were a bunch of rules in a rulebook in a library in a financial district in a city in a microcosm, then one of the rules would state: People should not fly.



People have legs and feet for a reason you know.  People need to use their legs to walk to the couch so they can watch people pretend to fly on the television.  And maybe walk to the grocery store.  And maybe to walk back home.  BUT THERE IS NO NEED FOR FLYING PEOPLE.

I'm not saying that we should abandon air travel -- although that may further develop bus transportation.


But if people could fly they would need wings, which is another appendage to wash, clean, and take care of.  If they ever had to get surgery for your wings, they'd have to see a flapologist.

And whenever you get into a flying accident, you would need to contact your flying insurance agent.


WHAT A HASSLE!

So while you wonder what's going on, I'll wonder how I got the idea to write such a crazy post in the first place.

I can't finish anything!

I've come to a conclusion today.  I've realized that I have problems finishing things.  I'm pretty sure it's a mix of procrastination and lack of motivation, but it's become quite a problem.

When I don't finish things, it's almost like me kicking myself in the face or jumping off a cliff or locking myself in a bear cage and throwing the key into someone else's fat-free yogurt.



That's when I thought "Maybe I should ask my therapist about this."


But then I realized I don't have a therapist.


So then I started experimenting to see what I could do to increase my focus.


I'm sorry to say that I only found a partial solution.  

Addition 1


Typo 1

Don't try this at home.

Rainy Days

With spring comes showers and with showers comes . . . more showers.